Wanna know about one of my favorite things my husband has ever done? A few months ago, he wrote a Bible verse in Sharpie on a piece of white paper and taped it to our bedroom door (facing into the room.) The verse is Song of Solomon 2:15. I've read that book several times, but I never noticed this verse before.
It says: "Catch all the foxes,
those little foxes,
before they ruin the vineyard of love,
for the grapevines are blossoming!"
I love it. I don't know if he has any clue, but I read it multiple times a day, and every time it renews my desire to catch those foxes. Foxes like annoyance, selfishness, greed, anger, insecurity, stubbornness, self-centeredness, self-pity, and lack of discipline. Daily there are little foxes trying to ruin our vineyard, and this verse is a wonderful reminder that daily we need to catch those foxes. They are not allowed to ruin our vineyard.
Especially since the grapevines are preparing to blossom. ;)
Friday, July 30, 2010
Thursday, July 29, 2010
I Made It!
Check out this post I wrote fourteen months ago: http://katieniles.blogspot.com/2009/05/nothing-new-under-sun.html
I wrote it to chronicle the beginning of my journey of reading through the Bible, Genesis-Revelations. And as of Wednesday of this week, I have officially read through the entire Old Testament! I've read the New Testament through several times, so I have technically achieved my goal! Although I still plan to keep going with my entire read-through.
I don't think I have ever had such a productive, impactful, relational, consistent Bible reading time as I have for the past fourteen months. It is amazing to sit back and try to take in the whole big picture of what God has taught me through this. I'm kicking myself that I didn't journal much of it, but I guess that just means I will have to go through it again with a journal next time!
Reading through the Old Testament like this has definitely changed my relationship with God. It has changed my view of God, of his Story, of my purpose. It has been amazing to me that, at so many points a long the way, what I read was so applicable to my life, struggles, and joys. Even the times I would miss a few days, or even a week (which happened a few times...), were divinely arranged, because then I wouldn't have read certain things on the certain days I needed it most. God is just so cool like that.
Since I didn't keep much of a journal through this reading, I wanna write down quickly a few of those times when his Word matched up with my life so perfectly.
- God promising to bring the Israelites "home to their own land" right when I needed that same promise to make it through my last year of college.
- God teaching Job that he is God - and who are we humans to question him or his plans? - as I was questioning some incomprehensible situations, like the unexpected, tragic death of a dear friend and mighty woman of God.
- The love stories of Songs and Hosea as I was going through some ups and downs in my own love story
I know there are so many more, but you get the idea. Above everything else, I feel like God has grown in me a deeper, stronger love and passion for his Word, in both its written form (the Bible) and living form (Jesus Christ). I am so excited now to read the New Testament in the context of what I have learned from the Old Testament. I think it will give me fresh eyes to understand the society into which Jesus came, and the world-shattering change his death and resurrection made.
I can't wait!
I wrote it to chronicle the beginning of my journey of reading through the Bible, Genesis-Revelations. And as of Wednesday of this week, I have officially read through the entire Old Testament! I've read the New Testament through several times, so I have technically achieved my goal! Although I still plan to keep going with my entire read-through.
I don't think I have ever had such a productive, impactful, relational, consistent Bible reading time as I have for the past fourteen months. It is amazing to sit back and try to take in the whole big picture of what God has taught me through this. I'm kicking myself that I didn't journal much of it, but I guess that just means I will have to go through it again with a journal next time!
Reading through the Old Testament like this has definitely changed my relationship with God. It has changed my view of God, of his Story, of my purpose. It has been amazing to me that, at so many points a long the way, what I read was so applicable to my life, struggles, and joys. Even the times I would miss a few days, or even a week (which happened a few times...), were divinely arranged, because then I wouldn't have read certain things on the certain days I needed it most. God is just so cool like that.
Since I didn't keep much of a journal through this reading, I wanna write down quickly a few of those times when his Word matched up with my life so perfectly.
- God promising to bring the Israelites "home to their own land" right when I needed that same promise to make it through my last year of college.
- God teaching Job that he is God - and who are we humans to question him or his plans? - as I was questioning some incomprehensible situations, like the unexpected, tragic death of a dear friend and mighty woman of God.
- The love stories of Songs and Hosea as I was going through some ups and downs in my own love story
I know there are so many more, but you get the idea. Above everything else, I feel like God has grown in me a deeper, stronger love and passion for his Word, in both its written form (the Bible) and living form (Jesus Christ). I am so excited now to read the New Testament in the context of what I have learned from the Old Testament. I think it will give me fresh eyes to understand the society into which Jesus came, and the world-shattering change his death and resurrection made.
I can't wait!
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
A Lovely Reminder
I was rediscovering one of my favorite CDs last week, Bethany Dillon's So Far: The Acoustic Sessions, and a line from "Hero" jumped out at me (which her lyrics do a lot, cuz they are so freaking brilliant). She sings, "What is love without much risk?"
Wow.
When you think of love, when you try to define it, does risk ever come to mind? I know it doesn't for me! I tend to think of love as safety, compassion, security, wrapped around me like a warm blanket on a cold night. But when you look at love, real, unconditional love, well... it's just not safe at all. There is nothing secure or comfortable about it. When you love someone unconditionally, you have to be willing to love them no matter what they do. And you can't control them. You just have to trust that, if they love you back, they won't hurt you. Or you may have to love them even if they don't love you back.
In the song she was talking about God's love for us, that God takes a huge risk in loving a sinful, unfaithful group of people. But it got me thinking about not just God's love for us, but our love for each other. Loving other humans is hard. We've all been hurt by people we love. In fact, I cannot think of a single person whom I love deeply who has not hurt me at some point. That's just the way we are, imperfect beings who, no matter how hard we try, will let the ones who love us down.
So why do we expect that to go away in marriage? I would say if love requires risk, then a great love like marriage requires an even greater risk. But we see marriage as safe, secure. We are so anxious to be married and "settled" and "committed", partially because those words sound safe and risk-free. Then, when our spouse lets us down or hurts us, we are shaken. We can't understand how it could happen because, after all, we are married. We said "I do, forever and ever." So we shouldn't have to deal with heartbreak and insecurity and disappointment now, right?
Anyone who's been married longer than a few weeks (days?) knows that is just not true. Please don't think I am being cynical or down on marriage right now, because I am definitely not. But I do think we need to remind ourselves that a marriage is made up of two imperfect people, and it involves huge risk, no matter how long you are married or how deep your love is. By recognizing that trusting your life and heart to another human is a daily risk, you can appreciate the beauty of a successful marriage that much more. Because, for me, being married to my amazing husband is a huge risk that is well worth taking.
Wow.
When you think of love, when you try to define it, does risk ever come to mind? I know it doesn't for me! I tend to think of love as safety, compassion, security, wrapped around me like a warm blanket on a cold night. But when you look at love, real, unconditional love, well... it's just not safe at all. There is nothing secure or comfortable about it. When you love someone unconditionally, you have to be willing to love them no matter what they do. And you can't control them. You just have to trust that, if they love you back, they won't hurt you. Or you may have to love them even if they don't love you back.
In the song she was talking about God's love for us, that God takes a huge risk in loving a sinful, unfaithful group of people. But it got me thinking about not just God's love for us, but our love for each other. Loving other humans is hard. We've all been hurt by people we love. In fact, I cannot think of a single person whom I love deeply who has not hurt me at some point. That's just the way we are, imperfect beings who, no matter how hard we try, will let the ones who love us down.
So why do we expect that to go away in marriage? I would say if love requires risk, then a great love like marriage requires an even greater risk. But we see marriage as safe, secure. We are so anxious to be married and "settled" and "committed", partially because those words sound safe and risk-free. Then, when our spouse lets us down or hurts us, we are shaken. We can't understand how it could happen because, after all, we are married. We said "I do, forever and ever." So we shouldn't have to deal with heartbreak and insecurity and disappointment now, right?
Anyone who's been married longer than a few weeks (days?) knows that is just not true. Please don't think I am being cynical or down on marriage right now, because I am definitely not. But I do think we need to remind ourselves that a marriage is made up of two imperfect people, and it involves huge risk, no matter how long you are married or how deep your love is. By recognizing that trusting your life and heart to another human is a daily risk, you can appreciate the beauty of a successful marriage that much more. Because, for me, being married to my amazing husband is a huge risk that is well worth taking.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Nothing Can Separate
"And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow — not even the powers of hell can separate us from God's love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below — indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:38-39
NOTHING can separate me from God's love. Paul lays out this list in one of my favorite chapters of the Bible, Romans 8, and it is constantly on my mind in some form or fashion.
Here's my own list of what can't separate me from God's love:
- My failure to live up to Christ's example
- My selfishness in relationships, especially marriage
- The uncertainty of not having a clue what my life will look like in the next month
- Kids at work not obeying me, and me getting impatient with them
- My miscarriage and my fears of either not getting pregnant, or miscarrying again
- My husband's struggle against a sexual addiction
This isn't a list of the bad stuff in my life, although I could read it that way if I forget what the list is about. These are just a few of the things that CANNOT separate me from God's love, from his salvation, from the redeeming work he is doing in me, and using me to do in others. His love never fails, and through him, I am more than a conqueror! I am a co-heir with Christ! I am called according to his purpose, and he works all things together for my good! (Can you tell I am LOVING Romans 8?)
This is where my peace has come from for the past five weeks. It has been a supernatural peace during a time when my human nature would otherwise fall into despair, hopeless grief, anger, and doubt. Instead I have peace, hope, and faith that I will give birth to a whole, healthy baby in less than a year, that Isaac will have a teaching job this fall, that we will find a place to live, and that our battle for our marriage has prepared us to pour light and hope into others who are going through the same things.
And it has all been God, believe me! Because without him, I am nothing.
NOTHING.
NOTHING can separate me from God's love. Paul lays out this list in one of my favorite chapters of the Bible, Romans 8, and it is constantly on my mind in some form or fashion.
Here's my own list of what can't separate me from God's love:
- My failure to live up to Christ's example
- My selfishness in relationships, especially marriage
- The uncertainty of not having a clue what my life will look like in the next month
- Kids at work not obeying me, and me getting impatient with them
- My miscarriage and my fears of either not getting pregnant, or miscarrying again
- My husband's struggle against a sexual addiction
This isn't a list of the bad stuff in my life, although I could read it that way if I forget what the list is about. These are just a few of the things that CANNOT separate me from God's love, from his salvation, from the redeeming work he is doing in me, and using me to do in others. His love never fails, and through him, I am more than a conqueror! I am a co-heir with Christ! I am called according to his purpose, and he works all things together for my good! (Can you tell I am LOVING Romans 8?)
This is where my peace has come from for the past five weeks. It has been a supernatural peace during a time when my human nature would otherwise fall into despair, hopeless grief, anger, and doubt. Instead I have peace, hope, and faith that I will give birth to a whole, healthy baby in less than a year, that Isaac will have a teaching job this fall, that we will find a place to live, and that our battle for our marriage has prepared us to pour light and hope into others who are going through the same things.
And it has all been God, believe me! Because without him, I am nothing.
NOTHING.
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